Can we doubt God?

Can you doubt God?

Better yet… are we allowed to doubt God? Is it okay to doubt God? If I doubt God does that mean my faith diminishes? Does God get mad at me if I doubt Him?

If you've ever thought about these questions, welcome to the club. 

(you can stop holding your breath now)

You are not alone. I have doubted my faith. I have doubted what is said in the Bible. I have doubted God. Not only have I doubted, but I DO doubt. 

Though all of us probably doubt God at some point, it is rarely talked about openly. And when it is, often I hear doubt talked about negatively. You shouldn’t doubt. You can’t question that. You know what the Bible says is true. 

After years of leaving my doubts like wandering birds trapped in my mind, I finally took a “shot of courage" and told my spiritual mentor of 4 years. And here is what she taught me…

“Riley, faith and doubt seem like two opposites that cannot coexist. But that's a misconception, faith and doubt are a package deal. Wrestling with doubt is part of the process of building faith.”

SO GOOD! 

Your doubt can be the labor pains to birth a new ‘soul-child’ of faith. Paul Tillich, an influential 20th-century German-American theologian, and philosopher, put it this way, “Doubt is not the opposite of faith; it is one element of faith”. 

The more I've spent time thinking about my mentor's words, I've come to believe the antithesis of faith is not doubt but indifference. Put differently, the danger is not in the doubt, but in the movement towards apathy. Doubting enters the ‘danger zone’ when its effect diminishes your desire to engage with God. As such, you may allow doubt to visit your mind but be sure to ban it from becoming the emperor. You can tell doubt is becoming the emperor when you start to make decisions in your life from a place of doubt, not faith. 

The place to which we carry our unresolved doubts is more important than whether or not we have doubts. You have the choice to take your doubts to the world or God. God’s love will embrace your doubts, but the world only tends to multiply and misguide doubts. Our God is not insecure. He’s not scared or shocked by your questions or misconceptions. I want to encourage you to confess to God all your doubts in prayer, journaling, or conversations with your trusted Christian friends. Write them all down or say them out loud, then wait. The coincidence (small miracles in which God chooses to remain anonymous) will start to happen. God will find clever ways to slowly, or maybe rapidly, use life to answer your questions and doubts. He will use scripture that jumps out on the page, a bypassing comment from a friend, the content in your pastor’s sermon or a signpost you see on the train to school. Also, God will work through logic and reason as you may find answers in history, science or apologetics books.

The story of Thomas, also known as the “Doubting Saint”, is a great example to demonstrate how God engages with our doubts. A few days after Jesus’ death and burial, the disciples gathered together when their resurrected leader showed up. But Thomas was not present to witness it. When the others recounted the event, Thomas balked: "Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands and put my finger in the mark of the nails and my hand in his side, I will not believe." A week later the disciples were again in the house, only this time Thomas was with them. The doors were shut, and Jesus appeared a second time. He invites Thomas to put his fingers in the wounds, and the doubting disciple exclaims that he now believes.

Do you notice how Jesus responds to Thomas’ doubts? He meets Thomas and shows him more than enough evidence to put his doubts to rest. God will meet you in the chaos and confusion of your doubts (but only if you ask). He will provide an opportunity for your doubts to surrender through the truth of who He is. Just as Thomas who touched the hands of Jesus, it is in closeness and intimacy with God that we find a resolution. God wants you to see the marks of His resurrection.  Finally, observe what Thomas did with his doubts; he admits his disbelief to his close Christian friends. Thomas’ story teaches us to express, not deny or fear, our doubts.

Here it is: if wrestling with doubts is inevitable, sometimes even beneficial, in our faith journeys, then what we do with our doubt is the most influential factor. My hope is you take your doubt to God. With open hands, He will reply with truth and love.